If it ain’t broke, iterate it anyway. That’s the Agile mantra we chant while sipping lukewarm office coffee, right? Because, let’s face it, ‘perfect’ is just a pre-alpha version of ‘slightly less broken.’ Think of it as existential software development. We’re all just debugging the human condition, one sprint at a time.
Speaking of software development, let’s talk SQL, since I’ve just learnt it. Ah, SQL. The language of the gods, or at least the gods of data. Is it just for tables and joins? SQL is the existential poetry of the digital age. It’s how we ask the universe, “Why are there so many null values in my life?” and get back a neatly formatted table. It’s not just data; it’s the philosophical backbone of every e-commerce website selling artisanal beard oil.
Now, let’s pivot to the geopolitical theatre of the absurd. Canadian steel. Is it that good? Or is it just that everyone’s got a crush on the new PM, since the last one turned out to be a little weird? It’s like when a band gets a new drummer and suddenly their old songs sound amazing. Is it the drummer, or are we just experiencing a collective, temporary delusion? Maybe the steel is just really, really polite. ‘Excuse me, would you mind being a bridge girder?’ Or perhaps, it’s less politeness and more of a cosmic suggestion box situation. ‘Dear Universe, please make this bridge not wobble like a caffeinated chihuahua on roller skates. Sincerely, Commuters.’ And the steel, being a diligent employee of the cosmos, just shrugs and goes, ‘Fine, but I’m charging extra for the existential dread reduction.’ Because let’s face it, bridges built with polite steel are still bridges, and bridges are just a continuation of a road for cars, paved with the hopes and dreams of people who are late for work. And if that steel isn’t polite, who knows, maybe it’ll just decide to become a giant, sentient paperclip and hold the whole city together with sheer, metallic spite. You wouldn’t want that, would you? Think of the traffic. So, back to Canadian steel… is it that polite? Does it whisper sweet nothings to the architectural blueprints? Does it offer to hold your hand during particularly windy days? Because a 50% tariff suggests it’s either the most courteous metal on Earth, or someone’s having a very expensive, very shiny laugh.
And while we’re pondering the mysteries of the universe, there’s a lunar eclipse happening. You know, that cosmic event where the Earth decides to play shadow puppet with the moon. It’s like a celestial PowerPoint presentation on the fragility of existence. Where can you see it? Well, not from your office cubicle, or your computer screen. Get out there. Find a hill, a rooftop, a really tall stack of old sticky notes. Gaze up and ponder the infinite abyss. Is it just a shadow? Or a metaphor for the ever-growing backlog of life?
Maybe the lunar eclipse is just a giant, cosmic bug. Maybe it’s a feature, not a bug? Who knows? That’s the beauty of Agile, right? We’re all just figuring it out as we go, iterating our way through the darkness, hoping we don’t deploy a critical error to production at 4pm on a Friday.
So, next time you’re stuck in a sprint planning meeting, debating the merits of Canadian steel or wondering if SQL is secretly sentient, remember the lunar eclipse. We’re all just tiny specs in a vast, ever-changing universe. And if it ain’t broke, iterate it anyway. Because, in the grand scheme of things, what’s a few more bugs?
Shiel Yule 